


You of All Things

by Lizicia



Category: The Blacklist (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/M, Introspection, Some angst, why are they so easy to ship?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-06
Updated: 2013-11-06
Packaged: 2017-12-31 16:33:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1033885
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lizicia/pseuds/Lizicia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>'He isn't sure when it happened because he sure didn't plan it but facts are facts – Donald Ressler likes Elizabeth Keen.' Or Ressler contemplates things he doesn't understand.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You of All Things

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't mean to ship Keen and Ressler but damn, there is something very captivating about them. They have chemistry even without trying. So there you have it, a sort of rambling thing with a side of story.  
> Double-posted on FF.net.

He isn't sure when it happened because he sure didn't plan for it but facts are facts – he likes her. And even worse than that, he cares for her. That was definitely not a part of the plan. Donald Ressler is not supposed to even think about Elizabeth Keen in any non-professional way.

The obvious answer would be that it started with the Stewmaker, when she survived something dreadful and when the realization of what almost happened made her crumble in front of him. When she reached out to him, he felt the first cracks appear in his impenetrable emotionless mask as he held her in the middle of a dirt road and whispered soothing nothings in her ear.

But, he now thinks, it wasn't really the first time. She'd been slipping closer to him since the beginning, since he became her reluctant and unwilling partner. And yet, there was something strangely alluring about her, something familiar.

He watches her prove herself every day and a part of him recognizes that the thing that drives her is the same thing he remembers in himself in the beginning. When he hadn't seen so much and been disappointed so many times; when there were only possibilities and the desire to change the world. He sees the innocence in her and it draws him to her which, in turn, unnerves him.

The innocence which infuriated him to no end as she protected her husband despite all the mounting evidence proving his guilt. Donald has no illusions about that man; there is something about Tom Keen that puts him on edge and he found himself afraid for her, afraid of how she would be disappointed and tried to make her see that. And even though Tom was checked out by the FBI and the CIA and whoever else, he still doesn't believe there isn't more than meets the eye to that man.

And he tells himself it has nothing to do with Keen. He's sure there was nothing she could read on his face during the whole ordeal; she probably had no desire to, having been so preoccupied with Tom. And if Donald felt the need to protect her, it was because she's his colleague. But he also remembers the look on her face when Tom was acquitted and he also saw the flicker of doubt still burning behind her eyes. Saw the doubt which had crept in and would never leave her because the seed had been planted.

He would never admit it to anyone but a dark part of him rejoiced in that doubt and he pushed that thought away the moment it appeared.

He prides himself on being a professional, cool, rational individual and thinks no one can guess his inner workings because he doesn't want them to. Of course, he is wrong.

"Be careful, Donald, you're a bit too obvious," Red tells him at a crime scene and he keeps his face straight and refuses to rise to the bait, feigning ignorance over whatever he's implying. But Red's smirk and his smug face make something turn and twist inside of him and he knows that _he_ knows.

And Red is none too quick to point that out. "You know, she is a married woman."

His implication strikes a chord deep inside and he loses his cool for a moment. "Aren't you the one who keeps telling her not to trust him?"

The victorious smirk that flashes over Red's face makes him realize his mistake in saying that but it's already happened and he can't take it back.

Red's voice is condescending but with an underlying, oddly sympathetic tone. "Oh, Donald, you really should know better."

And, oh, he does know better. After all, he's been on the other side of this particular twisted tale and he's sworn to himself to never do anything like that. He's been Tom Keen and he's lost the woman he loved and he doesn't wish that upon anyone. There's nothing worse than being blindsided like that.

Then again, he was never accused of having betrayed his country either. Tom Keen is not the innocent one here.

Nevertheless, he keeps his distance from then on. He doesn't treat her any differently, doesn't even look at her when he doesn't have to and whenever he gets the chance, pushes her harder, to the brink of irritation, all to stop her from getting closer.

He reports her after Barnes makes her drop her gun, even though he knows why she did it, knows that she couldn't let an innocent man die because that is who she is.

And when he sees the brief hurt over her face, he is confronted with the startling realization that she has begun to trust him and it makes everything so much more difficult. He tells himself he doesn't care. She's a rookie, she deserves to be pushed.

The thought gives him the strength to not give her any leeway and it works for some time. But the next time she is in danger – and it's all Red's doing, of course – it all goes out the window and his heart races a tad too fast, threatening his objectivity. Red smirks and lets him know just how much he sees but he doesn't breathe easy until she is safe and the grateful look in her eyes as he once again saves her, crumbles his resistance.

He is drawn to her like a stupid moth towards a flame which will burn him, destroy him, make him go up in flames. But the moment she smiles at him, an honest, relieved smile, he finds it hard to care.


End file.
